If you are looking to save a bit of cash by having your wife or partner do some of your secretarial duties for you, then read on before making any decisions!

On a recent home improvement journey to B&Q with my wife, my phone rang and having forgotten to connect the “hands free” I couldn’t answer the phone myself. The phone displayed only a number, so I had no idea who was calling, but suspected that someone was looking for a Piper.

In an attempt to help, my wife took the phone and in her best telephone voice answered saying “hello, Keith’s phone”. The call, as it turned out, was work related and the caller was interested in finding a Scottish Piper for his wedding next year.

I asked my wife to ask for his name and the date of the wedding and tell him that I’d call back as soon as we reached B&Q.

The following conversation ensued:-

Wife: What’s your name?

Caller: blah, blah

Wife: “OK Brian and what’s the date of your wedding?

Caller: blah blah (but a bit louder)

Wife: OK, yes Brian, I’ve got that, that’s great, I’ll get him to call you back in 5 minutes

Caller: blah blah, (one word louder than the others)

Wife: Yes, I’ve written it down…Brian (Puzzled glance at me)

Caller: blah blah

Wife: Yes, Brian with an R, I’ve got that!

Caller: blah blah

Fearing that this could have gone on for some time, my embarrassment forced me to pipe up, with “his name’s RYAN”.

Wife: Oh?! Ryan!, sorry, I thought you said Brian!

Hanging up the phone with her face the colour of beetroot, I asked “Brian with an R?..Really??

Ryan did book a piper, but probably because he had a sense of humour.

If readers have any amusing stories of their own, please feel free to post them here.

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